darkdestine56
"When I step into the light."
"I'm sorry."
"Think about it for a while
You'll thank me when you doYeah that's what she told me
When I was about to jump into you
And now I'm miserable just the same
'Cept I'm with her instead
And now I'm wondering what the weather's like
Inside of your head
Does it snow? Does it rain?
Has the sun set on your memory, has the moon brought back the pain?
And are you cold? Do you need my coat?
Do you still sing? Cause I need your note
And time is torture to my brain
Weeds growing everywhere
I feel like an empty garden
With no one to water me, or care
And she is like my hurricane
Yeah she's left me without a home
And I try to call you up again
But you do not answer your telephone
Are you busy? Are you still mad?
Has the ringing made you weary, has the silence made you sad?
And are you cold? Do you need my coat?
Do you still sing? Cause I need your note
There's a fire burning in my heart
And I'm still learning where to start
To tell you that I need you more
Than I thought I could
Are your thoughts still on me?
'Cause I do not expect them all to be
But I'm still cold, and I lost that coat
Do you still sing? Cause I need your note
It went oh"
Note - Anthony Da Costa
This is the only place I suppose I could really post this right now. I don't know why. But most likely it's because I am a bit scared, if not much more than a bit scared, and I want to say something, but not anywhere that people will see it. Well, certain people I guess. Who knows?
-
I just wept.
I cried.
I'm sorry.
-
March 23rd
-
I haven't cried in years, and I'm waiting for it to hit me. I know when it does, it will either be like opening a floodgate for every moment where I should've cried, or it will be like it's not even happening. And maybe it never will. God, I hope not. I am so fucking sick of priding myself on being some happy-go-lucky person. I am not strong. I am not above the pain that invades the lives of everyone I know. I'm just another dude, who's naked underneath his clothes like everybody else. And there is a beauty in that, but lately I don't really seem to understand it. I spend more time being quiet these days. Which only means I spend less time looking people in the eye and loving them or being loved by them, and more time with my eyes averted, lonely thoughts charging full throttle into my optimism, making me long to be alone, to be away, to be soaked in a cold and sobering sense of hopeless reality. What happened to me in the course of three and a half weeks? Why are change and love so hard? Loneliness is such a mystery to me. I am surrounded by people and the love that they give to me, but I think at the end of the day, when I go to sleep by myself in bed, I know - whether I want to or not - that there will be days when I don't wake up. Days that I never even see. And the fact of the matter is that I will have to face those days on my own, no matter how many people are with me when they arrive. I just hope that before they get here, I will be able to say that I cried again. I hope that I will be able to feel what is happening to me, and just submit to the pain or the joy as I am meant to. I'm waiting for it to hit me.
No Rebels - Stick it to the man!
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Happy Wearing Green Day. - Today I thought I would share some pictures of our kitty Gigi. Gigi was a rescue...
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